Today, we are going to talk about the first of the eight essentials, Peace. Yes, your children need peace, so let me explain. Proverbs 17:1 says, “1Better is a dry morsel, and quietness therewith, Than a house full of feasting with strife.” Many of us parents know what its like to grow up in a home where mom and dad fought a lot.
Sometimes it was in front of us and other times, we heard them through a closed door.
Situations such as theses can create such tension in children. Frankly, it can be very hard to deal with for any child. I want you to read what Pastor Tom Nelson has to say about this subject;
Many of you grew up in homes that were marked by consistent explosions and anger of one or more parent and you saw fighting, unresolved conflict. Many of you grew up in homes where the way that you resolved conflict was to turn and one would freeze the other out. You remember how it was to walk on eggshells, knowing that there was great tension in the home? And that is why when you hit about age 16, you could not wait to get your license, so you could get away from that. And that is why when you turned 18, you could not wait to flee those city limits to get away from your home. I believe that the most valuable thing that I provide for my child is that I, as a husband, must demonstrably love my wife. Fathers, the greatest thing you do for your children is to love your children’s mother, because there is essentially no sin that a child will not forgive, as long as the parents love each other.
I used to think that all parents knew this, but I found out I was wrong. You do not conflict with your mate in front of your children. I thought we all knew that and I found out we did not. You never, ever conflict with your mate in front of your child. You discuss with them and it’s good for kids to watch parents work through conflict. But if you see something rising, you go back into the bedroom to talk it out. You don’t rob that child of the peace of his home. And you do not, in a home as parents, play the part of a spoiled brat and one parent freeze out the other. Have you ever seen this happen, where there’s “unresolution” to a conflict and one parent will freeze the other one out? And now that child grows up with tremendous tension.”
Parents, I will end today with this, venting your anger with your spouse isn’t worth the damage it will do to your children.
Tune in next week for the next of the essentials, time with their parents.