Last week, I posted some tips to help you cover and protect your children. This week, I want to continue with some additional points and concerns. I want to start by opening up my life a little so you can get a better idea of what can happen when your child is left uncovered.
As a teenager, I was left to learn about life on my own. Because I was left uncovered by my parents, I was introduced to things that really affected my life negatively.
I was introduced to pornography at the age of 14 by those around me. I was coerced into becoming sexually active by my peers and even by my cousin at 15 yrs of age. I was even taught that it was cool to have multiple relationships at the same time.
I was introduced to alcohol and strip clubs at the age of 16 by a family friend. I was taught that all the above things were normal and expected of me as a young man. I truly can’t remember having a positive example to learn from, except the good that I learned from The Cosby Show.
I want to submit to you that all of the above came about because my parents checked out of my life instructionally. Sure, they could argue that they did the best they could at that time, but doing nothing isn’t a good effort. All of this and more can happen to your children also if you decide to be a passive parent to them. Remember what I said before, “Your results don’t have to be intentional to be your reality and in most cases, your responsibility”.
Look around you and you will see more examples of kids living a life void of Godly parental leadership. I could spit statistics and such, but I don’t want to do that. Instead, I want to encourage you take some time and be watchful. Watch the kids your children are around. Are they being a good influence to your kids and what are their parents allowing them to do? Watch the kids in your church and see how disengaged the parents seem to be as their kids are in the back of the church with friends. You’ll notice girls wearing enticing clothes, pregnant teens, boys looking like girls, girls looking like boys, etc. Watch your own kids and see if you notice a negative pattern in how you are raising them. You may find out that you are doing to them the same things that you hated about how you parent’s raised you. The whole key here is for you to become aware.
Here are this week’s tips to help you better guard your children;
- Talk to your children. Ask them if they feel you are distant from them. Ask if the feel neglected or if they feel you are hypocritical in what you say compared to what you do.
- Be willing to apologize to your children if you have fallen short in your parenting. Make a renewed commitment to become a proactive parent. It is never too late!
- Seek out resources to assist you in learning to become a better parent. There are books, videos and even bible studies that will equip you with the tools you need to raise your children.
- Spend time in prayer, asking God to show you first any past hurts that are still affecting your life. Ask Him to heal you from those things so that it stops with you.
- Be willing to forgive those who hurt you in the past, even if they don’t admit doing anything wrong.
- Be willing to ask your kids to forgive you for any wrong you have done to them and began immediately to rebuild the relationship between you and them.
I want to end this by saying that all of the above are some of the things I had to do with regard to my own children. God has helped me to avoid passing the generational curse on to my children and He will help you too.
Till next time,
STAY ON GUARD AND STAY AWARE!